Vacillating

I am vacillating through the stages of grief every day.
Morning prayers are usually done in acceptance.

My pastor shares calming words and prayers. 

My daughter's family does this with me, in a different state. 

This man is very well educated and wise.

Then I move quickly past denial and check the stats for my county (170K population- one hospital)

A bit of anger always slips by me here....

I then start the bargaining section of the day.

If I only go to the store for five minutes and completely cover, it will be ok.

If I only stay in at the food pantry and pack boxes by myself, if I have it, the boxes will have two days to rest before delivery.

Back to anger. 

If they could only understand that they cannot deliver food without gloves and a small mask....

Why can't people just listen to the actual news conferences rather then the spin?

Off to depression

How in the world are the working poor going to survive this if we don't get our act together?

Why do I feel the need to do this instead of garden.

Maybe just five more games of Words with Friends.

I wish I had paid more attention in home ec.

Back to acceptance

The garden is coming along.

The tulips and daffodils are all up. 

Ancestry and me

It was a beautiful day outside.
I can see it from my computer chair.
Stretched my legs this morning in the back yard.
Enjoyed watching the Youngers walk the block.

Doing some work on my home pages.
Decided to write up three generations my mom's family history.
She is getting antsy in full restriction.

Distancing myself from what is going on.
I needed some head space.
Suddenly what people passed from started jumping out at me.

Why be so morbid?
It is all about who we came from
knowing that we can move forward and be a pretty great people.

My mother and father both lost a parent when they were young.
Dad's Mom died in a terrible fire when he was 18 months old.


Mom's Dad passed in the middle of the war.
He was not allowed to serve,
but was in charge of a number of families in the area.
He had a stroke and died.









Looking back at our history
Disease took family members the generation before.

My grandmother's mother died in a TB epidemic of 1900 in Kentucky.
Her three year old brother also died.
That caused my great grandfather to move to Phoenix
to cure his TB.
The migration to Phoenix may be on again after this virus passes through.














My grandfather's mother passed in the Asian Flu pandemic of 1899.
Although his grandmother came and got him,
she raised him until she died.
My grandfather ended up on his own by the time he was twelve.
Worked his way across the states - mostly vinegar factories-
until he ended up working the company store in Hayden Arizona.

I have one Great Grand Aunt who had seven children in 1918.
In two years she lost one to war, three to a car accident and the rest to the flu.
She died ten years later working as a sister at a mental institution.

This will be an interesting time to write about and study.
We are a courageous world.
I take my lessons from those who lost important people that we can move forward.
I really believe the best of it is yet to come.

How will you spend your stimulus?

We have gotten to the point in our lives that we need very little.
I am blessed that we own our home and can afford our basics.
I know that lots of people will use their money for that.

That got me thinking
What would I do with my stimulus?
The temptation is to save it.

The idea of the stimulus is to stimulate the economy though
So I am looking for ideas.


This is a coffee shop with a mission. Last I heard, they buy their coffee from fair wage places all over the world.
Now, I have to be honest, I don't drink much coffee, but I do give it away.https://www.amity-coffee.com/

Website

This is a sweet boutique. They are staying open by being behind closed doors. A mother/daughter team--it is pricy for this retiree budget, but their things are nice.

https://www.fiferorchards.com/

I haven't purchased a CSA in a few years. Since there are places I can share the food, I think I will sigh up again. This local farm buys from a ton of smaller farmers in the area.

https://tonysbicycleshop.com/

My tripod bike was stolen last year. I guess it is time to replace it. Tony's not only sells bikes, but he repairs lots of bike and gives them away to the working poor community his shop is in.

Now I need to find a good small book shop......

That is the beginning of my list.
How about yours?
If you are a blogger who will get a stimulus and do not need it for basics, I ask that you keep the conversation going.

Lessons in moving in slow motion

In 1903 my great grandfather left St Louis for Chicago.

TB had taken his wife and youngest child.

He lived with his brother until he remarried 

and moved his family to a good "shelter in place" area, 

named Phoenix, in 1907.

He lived with TB for 30 more years.

"Dad" had been a business man,

then a grocer, and last

he became a poultry farmer.

In 1996 this was my husband's building.

We went into "shelter in place" for two full months. 

Then we lived with "move cautiously" for three more months.

We learned to make due. No more playing in the pool or going to the shops. 

Venturing out was guarded and for necessities only.

We only got out to go camping, around friends, in the middle of the Saudi desert.

The first event meant nothing to me

Until I lived the second event.

Never was I "caught short" again.

I listened and heeded warnings

even if they were false.

The PTSD has been very strong.

But, what I had forgotten is the other things I learned.

Surprisingly, they are emerging again.

Some learned to bond together.

Stop blaming.

Make sure everyone had what they needed (not wanted)

Limit outside contact while providing a great education for the kids.

Learn to stroll, not walk, the street.

Watch the sunset.

Read scripture.

Wear gloves.

And I learned to garden.

Very small in the past

Growing larger every season.

We learned to find local sources for eggs and milk

and just breathe. 

It was hard to get through the denial and anger stages.

Our way of life was gone.

But there is peace in acceptance.

And now we are busy 

keeping connections.

 And love on our doggies. 

We are children of the world. 

We can endure almost anything.

Be at peace.

It is a wave.

Socially distance and breathe.

New Testing announced

New development in testing just announced.
Around Sunday
Google + private industry will open for evaluation and referral...
Good job! Amazing. The new tests developed will have a fast return rate.
Walmart/Walgreen/Target are opening parking lots
for drive through as soon as the tests are available.

Still working on regiment for illness.
Hopefully less of us will need that.

Medicaid and Medicare regulations will be lifted in certain areas.
Will soon suspend all visitors from nursing homes except in end of life....

They also announced more Telehealth for those who need it.

Our reality of today.

Also:
Waiving interest on Student loans until further notice.
Filling strategic reserves.
Voluntary 14 day quarantine for those US citizens returning from Europe.

Listen to the conference yourself instead of what the talking heads say.
Actually, go back and listen to most of the conferences.
They have been very informative.

STOP! Think!

Stop! THINK !
Please go to the market, the restaurant, your favorite store. 
IF you hold up in your house for the next three weeks- 
the people on the bottom of the ladder will no longer have jobs.
Do you think that busser gets paid a wage when they are not ill?
How about the towel person at the gym?

 I just listened to an NPR report that 
Pikes Market in Seattle is STRUGGLING.
 Empty. 
Laying people off. 

How about all of us who work in the convention industry?
REALLY. 
Think about all those who work part time to put things together?
 the food venders, 
the workers. 
The Airlines are struggling, hotels are struggling. 
They are NOT getting paid so you don't get a cough and a fever-
 Maybe.

If you are not 65 or over or medically compromised, 
Please, wash your hands and keep living. 
If you begin to get a sniffle, take care of it.

If you are in the above group, 
take things as they are- wash hands, 
avoid TIGHT crowds
 and just be more aware of your surroundings. 

Just as you did with the flu people.

 If you are seriously ill, 
send someone else to do the chores
 and hide like you did with the flu. 

No one is dying in the streets- 
but if we close schools - 
and lay off all of the min wage workers....
there will be LOTS of hungry people/kids very soon. 
THINK about THAT and quit scaring us to death! 
This is CRAZY!